A simple path to relaxation - Article Exchange Forum

A simple path to relaxation
eyalindub
06-06-2007

A simple path to relaxation

Who doesn't want to be relaxed? What won't we do for it? We will pay a lot of hard-earned money on flight tickets and expensive resorts just to get away from our normal life and relax. We will submerge ourselves in boiling bubbling water, let people manipulate our muscles, use candles, drugs, music, and who knows what else just to relax, to forget about our troubles and smile a bit.

So what if I tell you that we are completely missing the point by doing all of these things just to relax? Don't get me wrong, I am not saying that all of that is bad for you, or not necessary. What I am saying is that all of these 'therapies' are pointless in the matter of relaxation.
These methods or therapies, as you already know, are only a treat after a long day (or even year) of being tense. They are not a solution for the day (or year) that comes after.

But don't worry there is a solution! Or maybe not!
Yes, I know it is a little bit confusing, but sometimes the truth is. In the next few paragraphs I will try to explain what I mean by this statement (and don't worry, I promise the following paragraphs will not be as pessimistic as the introduction  - they will be very optimistic). There is a way to become more relaxed and it is very easy - it doesn't involve any pain, loss of money, or 7 years in Tibet! Actually, it is so easy and under our noses that this is exactly the problem. Again I may seem confusing, so let us just begin.

Understanding the problem.

The way I see it, those so called 'relaxation solutions' and therapies will not really help us to relax because they are not really relaxing - they just give us an illusion of relaxation because in their nature they are happen in a relaxed environment (because we arranged it), and therefore in the same moment they make us think that we are relaxed or becoming relaxed. These therapies to help us relax are just illusions because life is not one big Jacuzzi and not one long vacation on the beach.

A wise man once told me I shouldn't try to be happy in a temple in the Himalaya, but in a 1 bedroom apartment downtown with two children and a mortgage. And you will probably say 'of course, but at least it help us relax for a little while' and I would say no - it helps us lie to our selves that it did.

Real relaxation is not about a sunny beach and a beer. It is about being stuck in a traffic jam, running late, trying to renew your insurance on the phone having waited on hold for 40 minutes, to be then hung up on just as you see a passing scooter swiping past your mirror and… to smile! And when the girl from the insurance company answers on your second attempt, real relaxation is to be nice to her, telling her 'good morning'.

A real relaxation is an inner thing, it suppose to follow us where ever we go and to be part of our permanent reality and not an outside temporary environment which we created in order to make us think we can be like that all the time, we won't unless it will be part of us, an inner understanding that will help us stay relax all the time or at least most of it (without a need for candles, a spliff or pink floyd).

What I am saying is you should let go of this solution idea. Trying to fight it will only add more tension to your life and you don't want that. Letting go of it means that for the meanwhile you should forget about trying to relax and to forgive yourself for not being relaxed. We will discus it later on again. For now just let go.
The way I see it every problem in life should come in 3 steps – awareness, frustration and improvement.

Visit my site for more information, therapy techniques, awareness exercises and relaxation practices. Relax-inside

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